the beauty of raw emotion

I've realized lately that i have really taken a liking to the action of blogging. It's quite entertaining. A blog parallels a diary, except that i have the privilege and ability to compose my thoughts in a quick manner, and also, like a diary, i am certain that nobody reads my blog--which is not necessarily a bad thing. Yet, if people do read my blog, well, i am glad to pretend that nobody reads my blog, and therefore, spill out my frank beliefs and opinions on the most random of topics. After all, as i said in my first entry, my blog is to expose who i am, not conceal my true nature with a website facade.

ANYWAYS! On Sunday, which is yesterday, i re-dyed my hair. Alas, i left it on for twice the maximum amount of time suggested, and ergo, now i have UBER-RED hair. LITERALLY, my hair is.. RED! I mean, it basically jumps at you and SCREAMS with CAPRICIOUS JOY in your ear: "HOLY MACKEREL! I AM TIFFANY CHENG (or jin, whichever you prefer)'s HAIR, AND FUCK YEAH, i am REDDDDDDDD! LOOK AT ME, and be FRIGHTENED BY MY SHADE OF GULES."

Some people like it, others think i went too far with the color. :X Oh well, as my didi said, what's done is done. To the people who do not like my current hair color : " it's a good thing that it's temporary, hein?"

i bet you're wondering, "wth is HEIN?"

why, i just learned today that the HEIN of french, is the HMM? of ENGLISH.

so, there ya go. 

ah, about my title, which should be the thesis of my blog, that which i keep avoiding, not intentionally, but because i basically have the focus of a goldfish.

I was watching television, and I saw a doc. on acting classes, where one of the exercises is called "spill," and what was it you ask? Basically, people got on stage, and SPILLED their guts. Obviously not literally, but they spewed out raw emotion. I LOVED it. I was particularly won over by one girl who has been through bulimia, anorexia, chronic depression - depression so deep, it was close to bipolar disorder- and she just screamed out all of her frustrations onto the wooden plank of that tiny, secluded, stage (seclusion as irony). There's something about the magic of stage lights, and people who want to listen, that make you want to be yourself, that make you want to shed the layers of labels, and present yourself as almost.. a new born child, free from society ideals and pressures; a child who has no preconceptions -- born as the spawn of raw human nature. Quite wonderful, i might add. Now, about the magic of raw emotion -- it moves you like no other. How do movies, or.. events make you cry? It is the truth of emotion that hits something in your heart, as if.. that certain movie, or that certain event in the movie, speaks exactly how you feel at that very moment, and magnifies it. What, then makes a great actor/actress? It is their ability to convey.. raw emotion -- to tap within their own souls to bring forth something...REAL, so real that it is almost.. CONCRETE, even if.. emotion isn't exactly considered.. concrete. I cried along with that girl's spewing of emotion, because, she let out something that hits close to everyone. PAIN. Pain in the most sensitive form -- in the emotional form, not the physical. 

In a bigger spectrum of view, I have to say, I love being human. We're all so vulnerable, because we have emotion, and yet, these emotions make us stronger. We're all walking examples of an oxymoron -- well.. not that drastic. haha.

On a lighter note, i'm in a strangely good mood. As in, i want to.. frolic in some.. flowers or something. Go to the park, eat animal crackers, gaze stars, that sort of mood. hmmmmmmmmmmm, and yet, i rather not do those things, because i would have nobody to participate with... and well, what's the fun in doing things by myself? I'm kinda sick of being my own best friend. Doing that in my childhood was very.. boring. 

:/

-Alors, Adieu, mes amis.

"Ne pas juger. Nous sommes tout seul humain."